I hoped that getting sober/clean would solve everything in my life. It didn't, but it did give me more freedom to address things in my life effectively.
I thought that working a recovery program would solve everything in my life, after all I was CHANGING my approach to things. It didn't.
I'll be honest, I felt cheated. I asked myself "why did I bother?". I was asking myself this just last week when some old mental health bugaboos began to surface again.
I felt like life and the Universe should reward me for not getting drunk and wasted all the time. As if drunk and wasted are default human settings and I was some martyr to have given that up. Hmmm...
Getting drunk and wasted made my life worse. And when I take drugs and booze out of the picture automatically some issues in my life improve, but not all issues. Even working a solid recovery program doesn't make life's challenges go away.
That is the truth I am facing head on these days. It's felt overwhelming. I remember why I drank and used in the first place, because I didn't want to feel and experience the things I am feeling and experiencing now. But I know that on some level this is my opportunity to choose to act differently this time. Same situation, different choices and see what the results are.
Alcohol and street drugs are not the only ones that can do not so good things to our bodies. You have quite a cocktail of chemicals that your body is dealing with. I echo the suggestions above that you sit down with a dr and lay out all the issues and meds and see if it's time to come up with a new game plan. I would also do this with a psychiatrist. Sometimes Dr's that do not specialize in psychiatry are not aware of how other drugs or drug combinations effect mental health issues.
This will not make all of life's challenges disappear either, but it might address some of the issues you are dealing with more effectively.
You have a lot on your plate, and I understand how difficult it can be to push through that. I have been dealing with a number of the same issues in the last few years.
you might want to check out the mental health section of these forums, and talk to others who are dealing with similar issues. Even read some old threads there.
I am so sorry that you are going through all this.