Originally Posted by DangerousDan
Nope. Not wrong Cadence.
Just falling on deaf ears.
The sooner you face the fact that you're perhaps only background noise in his life, the better for you.
Are you surprised he talks a good B.S line? Say it ain't so.
It's one of the first things we learn to do as active addicts and alcoholics.
It's our main maintenance and survival tool.
Ouch...Background noise... Yes, I suppose I am...
No, I'm not surprised that he talks a good BS line - what I AM surprised about is how many times I've bought in to it and how many times I was hurt by and and how many times I realized that it is just all BS (and then went back for more!).... He's a real charmer - witty, caring and seemingly sincere. I am sure that those qualities are PART of his real self but he uses them to unarm the unsuspecting... color me blind...
I'm getting a much better *feel* for the disease. My folks were alcoholics but they didn't use any "tactics" - they drank, got drunk and such was life. There didn't seem to be a lot of manipulations and BS in the home but I have no idea how their friends saw them.
I'm finding this honesty from you all to be rather... unsettling... but that's a good thing. Seems to me that if it comes from the horse's mouth one would
be wise to listen up and learn so's not to make the same mistakes again.... I'm listening (and taking notes!)
Thanks