Speaking for myself, it was all about the drama. I embraced it, then I hated it, then I needed it...for some sick twisted reason...Now, if I want drama, I watch a realty show...then I shake my head and thank the HP for guiding me out of the mindset I was in.
You have come so far, keep your resolve. Watch a soap opera or the Kardashians, believe me the urge will pass, just sit tight!