I woke up and read these responses after another difficult night. Thank you all for your advice. I feel like I am the only person I know who feels this way. I don't think anyone could understand unless they have gone through it. It is so hard to let go because I am all my son has. He's lost his friends, girlfriend and his dad is also an alcoholic and not involved and there for him. I worry that if I walk away, he might hurt himself and then I couldn't forgive myself. I am very torn. I am going to try though and want this craziness to end.