Welcome to SR. So sorry that, once again, yet another parent is confused, in pain and despairs because of an alcoholic.
My suggestion to you would be to read this Forum's recent threads about enabling, boundaries, acceptance and letting go. Also, get to Al-Anon meetings as soon as possible. Read the F&F stickies here and in the F&F of Substance Abusers forum, and the thread on 10 ways family members can help.
You will find so much help here from members, but be prepared that tough (but well-meaning) talk will be dished out. For most of us, that is exactly what we need to hear. The raw truth, not mere pats or pity.
All the best.
