Chickadees

Truth is...I'm not dependent on him for much. At most, he filled a void (loneliness) that only arose since I move from my most favourite neighbourhood and I was feeling a little isolated. He did a great job of filling in the gaps for me after I moved...he was around, he fixed things, he moved things. And I enjoyed his company, was comforted by his familiarness and his connection to my old neighbourhood. Soon enough I started to miss him, like a 'real' lover in a 'real' relationship. And then I started thinking/feeling things for him and started to want and wish for more of that.

What I've learned...I need to take care of my need for social time now that I'm a little farther away from my usual fixes (i.e. I could walk out my door at anytime, chat with neighbours for a minute or an hour, then happily go back inside and go about my day). Now I need to plan for that...on Friday after work for instance, or Saturday morning with friends over coffee.

I've also learned that although I've been good at avoiding or ignoring it, I still do want a partner to enjoy life with. My AFWB awakened feelings I had either long ago buried or just plain learned to 'forget about.' I still have hope that I will meet someone who I can have a healthy relationship with. I need to make more of an effort to put myself in situations where there is potential of meeting that person. I've even been considering internet dating (yikes!) .

So maybe my AFWB served a purpose for me. Maybe these are lessons I needed to learn and maybe this was life's way of telling me so (I'm a little stubborn, so of course a little nudge in that direction wasn't going to work

Anyway...thanks L2L, and to everyone else here. If I'm a codie or not, the lessons I'm continuing to learn about myself and my own 'issues' are priceless.

Good Roads,
Chick