Thanks so much, that means a lot. I have so much in so many ways. I am very alone, but I have great friends in Florida, a great kid and the best dogs ever. And you guys!! I struggle from a lot in my life, mistakes, abuse, and loss. My beat friend killed herself when we were 25 . I have lost a lover to a terminal disease. Blah blah but haven't we all? I just need to get real, life goes on. I really fear losing my old senior dog, he is seriously my world. The other big thing I fear bothers me day and night. That mistake I made. I am insane. I pace the house all day and talk to myself. Please tell me it gets better. And why don't drugs work on me. They don't.