Originally Posted by
LifeRecovery 
Lizatola-
I can only speak for me, but it took me five years of the alcoholic drinking, and him having an affair before I finally started to take care of myself. It takes what it takes and I was not ready one moment prior to when I was ready.
I worry for you, not because of what you posted about with change, but because so much of the energy in your life at the moment seems to be outwardly focused on him and not you. This just hits close to home for me. I thought that was what being in a relationship was about because that is what I had learned. I am learning that self-care is not selfish. What are you doing for your own self-care?
Finally anger also really helped me, and it helped to start the healing process.
I am glad you are here and sharing.
Thank you! Actually, I am attending 2 Al Anon meetings a week, working with a therapist and my sponsor, I play tennis weekly and work out, I'm getting busy putting lesson plans together for my son and his new school year, and I'm busy planning my fall hiking routine. I gotta back into yoga, though. Funny thing is: AH made a comment about how I was taking care of myself more and that's why he thought I was having an affair!