Thank you CB -
The timing of your post is perfect. My husband was just trying to explain something very similar and I couldn't wrap my head around it. He lived to use and used to live. (yuck). He feared DEATH. Death? or withdrawals??? I think that expression is far more literal then I ever thought.
What I am learning for me is.....is not just "hands of the addict," but it's "hands off the addict working a recovery" as well. I am not an addict and I don't understand. I don't want to minimize what he believes, I can not "help" him and his need for other addicts (NA) is very important because they do understand. He needs his people and I need mine!!
Staying on our prospective sides of the street is very important. It's not just an expression, it's a must for both of us!!