I understand how you feel but I think Anvil said it perfectly.....you do seem more concerned about his situation than he does. I've been there done that.....
I recently had to say "NO" to getting my son's car out of impound. The car is gone. G-O-N-E.....he's homeless....he lived in it.....and it's gone. In his case, he lost his shelter and his "currency". I suspect he was able to use the car to do drug runs in exchange for drugs, food or a place to stay. I knew that as long as he had the car.....he had currency.
It was hard to just say no. It was one of his last possessions of any value....and anything else he had left was in it when it got impounded. He was literally left with the clothes on his back. That was about a month ago. Today? He has gotten in contact with his sober friends and has been attending 2-3 AA or NA meetings per day. I'm not making any predictions nor do I have any expectations but that seems like a step in the right direction.
It's damn hard to just let someone you love free fall. It's terrifying. But as I read your post I see clearly that you are trying to do things for him to make YOU feel better. I did that for years and wish I hadn't......my son is 31. Sometimes....the most loving thing we can do is to let them fail or lose it all. If we care more than they do, it simply doesn't work.
gentle hugs from another mom
ke