What would you do?
Our 23 yr old A/S is out of our house. Been to rehabs the same vicious cycle over and over again...done the suboxone and still continues to abuse, misuse his suboxone and who knows what else. He also has a drinking problem....
Long story short he and his roommate were robbed by 2 armed robbers at their apt. approx. 2 weeks ago, they live in the hood!! Neither wanted to stay there because of safety issues and I don't blame them. They broke the lease, but had to pay an outlandish penalty and proration!!!
So now my son has been staying at a weekly hotel...in the worst part of town, his roommate conveniently move in with his girlfriend.
Our son is not working and has a limited amount of money to live on. I had been holding on tightly to the little money he had and finally gave him all his $1,800. to him last week. Who know's how much he has left. He literally does not know how to manage money and I can bet he has been using it hmmm....drugs and alcohol.
Okay this is my delimma...He has no way of getting his valuables out of his apartment, his car is in our garage and has been for a year plus.
Heck his stuff may already be out on the front lawn of the apartment complex???
It is killing me to know that he has his approx. $900. keyboard/piano and other stuff in that apartment and he may AGAIN loose everything.
In the robbery the jerks stole everything they could carry...laptop, playstation, cell phone, wallet, etc... so he has already lost so much.
In the past he's lost his stuff to pawn shops or just lost it because he was probably high somewhere and forgot it. He always seems to be misplacing or loosing stuff.
So now I am totally fighting the urge to NOT go get his stuff/piano. I know this is my enabling come out!!! YES, I've been re-reading the stickies!
He has been texting me off and on, and this afternoon he texted me talking about detoxing and going to rehab but in my heart I think it is only because he will be out of money soon and needs a roof over his head. We all know the pattern.
I know everyone has said that addicts are resourceful. I don't know sometimes I think he lacks total common sense!!! In terms of pulling yourself together when you have NO money, a felony (which he got in rehab for breaking into the house medicine cabinet, that's another story!!!) ... and no job history except for working a mere couple of hours at McDonald's....tons of unpaid medical bills...and no friends...just parasites. I just don't know how much of a hardass we parents are suppose to be.
In December he will get one last trust payout and my concern is that he may be just holding out trying to get a roof over his head until then. This has happened in the past. I keep hoping that he will grow a brain.
I would love to get his piano etc. and not even let him know. I'd just let him think that the stuff was history!
Okay so what are your thoughts???
I know these are consequences to his lifestyle, although them getting robbed was not of their own doing. HERE I GO AGAIN SOUNDING JUST LIKE AN ADDICT...huh???
Thanks everyone!