I actually don't have any friends or family who have been divorced- as common as it is out there, It is new to my world. That may be part of the reason I am taking this so slow- not ready for a "divorce" yet, but OK with a separation agreement. His actions are making it necessary for me to react to them on his timetable. I feel overwhelmed and out of control; I don't feel like I can make rational, good decisions, yet I know I need to do something. I was able to my an appt. for tomorrow with a lawyer I found on an online lawyer referral service- I hope he is a good one. I will look to make a consult with a couple more (I guess I'll use the service to find them, too) after the weekend on Monday morning. I wish I knew someone personally who has been through this and could direct me to a good lawyer- I feel like I'm shooting in the dark. Since he left, things, of course have been much calmer on the homefront. I am surprised that I do miss him, though, now that he is physically gone. He certainly abandoned me emotionally some time ago. It could be that now I have to figure out how to do all the "man" things around the house that he used to do, and I'm not exactly sure what they are or how to do them. He is also a workaholic and worked nonstop at his job and at home. I think that's why he's comfortable making the barter arrangement. I apparently never "appreciated" everything he did and he made me feel as though I am incapable of doing anything. Iam so exhausted and overwhelmed.