Originally Posted by
Alucard 
Its ok to be angry. A lot of people have this undying love and devotion to the alcoholic spouse and figure that trite sayings from anon groups help them make it through the night. Not me. "I didnt create it, cannot control it and didnt cause it....Let me add to that, I cancelled its contract"....Be angry. As angry as you want. Call him "it" if you please.
Dude, I don't know where you are getting your information about Alanon. It you went to a group that was like that then they were way out of line by the standards for any of the groups I have attended. A good way to look at it is think of Alanon as group therapy. Their purpose is to help you get better. Whether you choose to stay or leave is strictly your own choice and Alanon takes no position on that. I know because I left over a year ago and am in the process of a divorce.
What I get from Alanon is a set of tools that help me live a saner life.
Sorry for the derail but I thought that it was important to give a clear explanation of what Alanon really does especially for those folks who are considering attending. It doesn't mean there aren't dysfunctional groups out there and that is why it is important to attend more than 1 meeting at more than 1 group. Not all of them, even the good ones, are the right fit for you.
Your friend,