Struggling today
Im really struggling today.
Somehow or other (and I dont know how this happened) I seem to have quilte literally lost two weeks. Im exhausted and so tired. I have around 16 hours of sobriety and Im thinking fairly clearly. At least clear enough to know that I have to continue this way.
How should I get started? I mean I need major encouragement. Lift up the Big Book? go to a meeting? turn on an old movie and forget about life? weepy music about love and loss? Chocolate? I just want to feel loved right now and somehow held. There really is no one that I can turn to. Big book and Meeting really arent what I need, I just want a good old fashioned meal and be with my grandparents and people who made me feel sure I was loved from my childhood
my eyes are nipping right now and I feel a barage of feelings of things that all need looking at one by one and I just want to switch off the phone and go away to sort myself out.