I wish you well in your new journey. My wife left me with the children some 20 years ago. Now that I am sober, I feel a lot of guilt and remorse for my actions. It didn't get ugly because we both loved our children & I did get joint custody. Funny though, now that ex & I are both sober, we get along fine--almost like friends. She has re-married but now he (current hubby) is a drunk and I feel for her---even tried to get him to some meetings. Be strong, go forward and try and be there for your children--they need you. God Bless