Welcome splintered. I hope you will post on Friends & Family, as the others suggested. We're very happy you found us.
I went through this same thing many years ago, but my husband (who has now passed on) wasn't capable of stopping at that time. Many years later he did, but it was too late to salvage what we once had - and his health was ruined. I hope your husband will decide to reclaim his life. Please do stay and keep posting - we care.