Do you trust his therapist?
I only ask because a sudden emergence of sobriety plus bi-polar plus sex addiction plus ADD plus being accused of having an unhealthy relationship (with you) seems a bit suspect. Or maybe not, but it smacks to me of an over-enthusiastic therapist who's
just discovered his or her first DSM IV and is playing with a shiny new toy!
Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
Of course if he is so focused on himself and his own needs that there's no room in his recovery program right now to acknowledge you and yours, then I think that whatever you can do to back off and tread water while he gets some balance in his life would be a good thing. New sobriety isn't always the best time to start a new relationship. He needs to be selfish right now, and you need to let him.