I didn't think i had it either, Fancy. I joined here, sobered up relapsed, sobered up and repeated the process several times. The important thing is to stick with it and every time you relapse try to learn something from it. Why did this happen? What can i do to prevent it? Also, scare yourself during recovery. We often have to do something scary like go to rehab or go to an AA meeting or be honest with a doctor or someone about our drinking. Feeling safe means we're staying inside our comfort zone and our comfort zone has kept us an alcoholic outside of recovery. Honestly, if i can do it, you can do it.