Peaches04,
Your story sounds so similar to mine. I've caught my AH smoking pot a few times as well and it just makes me insane. I too have acted like a complete lunatic, begging, pleading, crying, screaming, shouting, hoping that one way or another I would get through to him. Of course it doesn't work. I am also tired of acted crazy and I have come to a point where I really don't feel angry any more. I think our hearts just get tired of being disappointed and eventually we get past the anger and we just accept that we can't make them get help if they don't want it.
I'm not very good at giving advice, but I know that these message boards have really helped me put things into perspective and I think you are doing the right thing by reaching out to others here. We are all here to support you and give you courage to see your way through. As you know from my previous posts, I have left my husband, and am going to my first alanon meeting tonight. Things are still hard, but I'm taking it one day at a time. Be strong and be true to yourself.