Payton- You are very wise to address this. Depression is treatable and you will feel better once you're proactive in seeking help. I've suffered from anxiety and depression for years, and am on medication. For years when I drank 'to cope', all I was doing was completely counteracting the effectiveness of the meds. Plus pouring a depressive poison down my throat at the same time! And I wondered why I ended up in a suicidal way!
Now my head is clearing, I can see things a bit more realistically.
Do go and seek help. I am thinking of you xxx