I guess I don't have a problem with alcoholics/addicts asking what they can do to mend their relationships, etc... why not come to the people who might know that answer?? I see great benefit in meetings where alcoholics are present - there is much knowledge to be gained in trying to see things from each others perspectives.
I wish my AH would sit in a room with Al-Anoners and really try to understand the codependent perspective. I am as baffling to him as he is to me.
Just my 2 cents.