Do Heroin addicts feel remorse
Im so p****d off today.Ive been thinking about me ex alot.
We were together for 12 years,some good but mostly bad.I couldnt see it it at the time but i do now.As long as i have know him he has been an addict.Two and a half years ago he managed to get funding to go into a rehab.He followed the 12 step programme for 13 weeks and told me he was clean.When home he attended NA meetings twice a day and kept his self busy.Not long after i fell pregnant.Three months into the pregnancy i started finding used needles and citric acid packets.He promised me it was just a blip and he would work hard to stay clean.When out daughter was born he was a mess.We were hardly spending any time together and he would stay out until late most nights,only come back for somewhere to stay.
We split for good when out daughter was only a few weeks old.I came home with a new baby to find my home littered with needles and god knows what else.He had even left needles in my kettle..
I used to take my daughter to his mums so she could get to know his family.They assured me he was now clean and on subitex.He wasnt,i found discarded citric packets in her home.We now have no contact with him or his family.I did say that if he provided clean samples he could see his daughter but he hasnt bothered.Probably because he cant....all he can do is bad mouth me and tells people i have taken his daughter away.In the two years she has been born he hasnt bought a nappy or milk...Im so angry.I often wonder if he will ever feel remorse or regret.Hes only happy when he has money for drugs and nothing else seems to matter.I dread the day i have to tell my daughter the truth about her dad.I dont think he will ever realise the extent of the damage he has done.I love him but hate him so much...