I to am in a similar situation. It's ruined my life and taken a toll on my kids as well. I have been with my husband about 7 and a half years. He was a party boy when I met him bit nothing like this. It's no longer a party when he got laid off 3 years ago he spent his days drinking hard liquor and pain pills. He be cane a different person. He lies spends what little money we have I'm the only one working and is belligerent to me constantly. Usually says he wants a divorce but doesn't leave or file for one. I'm so sorry for your pain I to am at the end of my rope I finally found this site and it helps. It helps to get your mind straight and know you are not to blame and also there is nothing we can do to change them. I'm here if you need to vent