Originally Posted by
Katiekate 
What does she want you to help her with???
This sounds like the manipulation.
Guilt about not knowing how to help her.
My mother is incredibly manipulative , and it is so hurtful, my realtionship with her is awful and she doesn't even know it. I spent a lot of time trying to help her, suggest things to her, take care of her, 2 summers ago she got smashed at a party at her neighbors house, fell in the pool and went straight to the bottom, two people had to pull her out, then denied that she was drunk, that is when I told her finally that I was done, it's all on you.
Sometimes you can only take so much then you have to just move away and protect yourself. You are not responsible.
I'm so sorry for your troubles and pain, love to you Katie
She cries that she wants help to get better, and she keeps telling us that none of us (myself, my sister, my father) have tried to help her, which could not be further from the truth. She cries that my dad has told her "I can't help you", which is TRUE! He can't, not at this point. She won't accept our help, we've told her that she needs professional help and we can't do it, so I don't know what else she wants from us. I'm sorry her sister died, and I'm sorry that we don't live at home, but her sister died eights years ago (and it was not sudden - cancer), and I have not lived at home since 1999, so she's had plenty of time to cope with all of this. Then she wonders why I don't trust her 100%, when she has not given me a reason to do so. I got her to tell me that she was going to AA, but she was very hesitant to even do that because she thinks that we are all going to criticize her, or something. She has not even told my father she is going. Why would we criticize her for getting help?! It only proves that the alcohol is ruining her mind and that she's not bent on getting better.