I'm sorry it was overwhelming. That is a tough road to truck financially.
But money, jobs, cars are replaceable. You or someone that could've been hurt by drunk driving is not.
Life is precious.
This trial will be over eventually & you never have to make that mistake again.
You live & you learn. It took me awhile to get it but for all the pain & suffering I caused myself & others, I feel triumphantly joyous now that I'm not an active addict anymore.
Freedom from addiction is priceless my friend.
It will get better, hang on.