Originally Posted by sapling
Don't you think if it was simply a matter of making a choice not to drink....None of us would be here?
Personally, I do think it is a choice. An easy choice? Not always in the beginning. Can it
seem impossible? Sometimes, yes. Is it impossible? Absolutely not. As totfit said, people have been quitting in this way since the beginning of time.
I don't look at this in terms of "right" or "wrong". I look at it as "what thinking is helpful for me?".
What gives me freedom and peace is quitting for good. Knowing that despair will come in life, tragedy, pain, beauty, joy, indifference...all of it will flow - without me drinking. Drinking is not an option. Ever.
This is what allows me to breathe, to move through life more easily. Since this is my chosen paradigm, ODAAT becomes moot. It is my belief that the calmness that may result when thinking about about not drinking one day at time is really just my addiction smiling. Sure it will calm down and leave me alone...the door is slightly ajar, isn't it? With ODAAT thinking, I've placated it. It loves that. Leaving no room for future use may send it pitching a fit for a minute, but with consistency and no reinforcing, it soon wears itself out and resigns itself to the facts. Just as a screaming toddler does.
Originally Posted by HitRockBottom70
Also I am trying to figure out a way to let my friends know when we are out to dinner or over to someone's house I no longer drink. Maybe saying "I am on a diet and if I have one drink I end up drinking way too much and eating too much" if they push I can just say "seriously, I can't have any alcohol". I think everyone would respect that and they can infer what they like.
If they push? In my world anyone who continues to push, insist, cajole, or otherwise be obnoxious needs a lesson in manners and boundaries. I am happy to provide that if the need arises
Hang in there RB. It gets easier. It really does.