My ah-ha moment was when I read a book by Robin Norwood: "Women Who Love Too Much." I had put off reading that book because I felt that my problem was that I didn't love ENOUGH--at least that was what AH led me to believe.
But that book was so fantastic, and one of the things she said was that she won't even start women on therapy until they'd been to at least six Al-Anon meetings. So I finally said "alright! alright! I'll go!"
It's hard to pick one important thing, but I guess one big thing was learning that my life doesn't have to be consumed with things I can't control. You learn what you're to own and you learn to release the rest, which is such a relief. Plus it's so great to be in fellowship with such great people instead of feeling so isolated.
Just relax. Do not feel you have to contribute. Contribute if you want, but just listening is completely OK. And remember to "take what you like and leave the rest." Most people will tell you to try several different meetings and pick a home meeting that feels comfortable to you.
Good for you for making this step. It's probably one of the most important ones you could make!!