Hi Beerbottles,
Welcome and glad you had the courage to post. I cannot tell you if you belong on this site or not, that is something for you to decide. Keep reading though lots of good stuff here.
What I do know is your story is very similar to mine (minus children) regarding how you behave when you drink.
I did not drink all the time but when I choose to, it was a lot. I also loved alcohol, liked to drink, like the taste etc.
Once I had one, I absolutely wanted another. Once in awhile I could stop at two but as a general rule I drank more than I had intended to.
I struggled for awhile, listening to other people (other drinking friends mostly) tell me I was fine, nothing was wrong, perfectly normal. Well, it didn't feel normal. It felt strange to have that feeling and I finally realized that drinking just wasn't fun anymore. the bad was outweighing the fun.
I think just about everyone has tried to moderate, some try and try but most of the posts here will reflect that the final answer was to just quit all together.
Keep reading here, there are so many people who have told good personal stories and will give good wisdom.