Wow.....that take BIG huevos to admit......not a pretty picture.
Like the time I babysat for my infant child....and passed out for a few hours. THANK GOD, OH THANK YOU GOD, nothing happened. I NEVER babysat abusing again, but if I was ANY KIND of man THAT would have been the end of USAGE at all.......but it goes on.
I have sooooo much to be ashamed for.....I totally understand how you feel.