I want so badly to have peace in my life wantstobehealthy. I am so glad I found SR. I am learning so much about myself and my situation. I really haven't addressed his drinking that much over the years. When I did nothing happened. That should have been a clue but it wasn't. I think what got me to really thinking was the last time I addressed his drinking and my concerns, etc. and he did nothing about it. For so long I've thought everything was my fault, my worry but no more. I want to take control of my life. For so long I have felt that I lost myself somewhere along the way in my marriage. I want to find me again. I want to be happy. I know now I haven't been happy in so long and that has affected my life in every aspect....work, friendships, etc. I feel like I'm heading in the right direction now and I know it will take time and patience and tears. By coming here, going to Al-Anon (first meeting next Tuesday) and reading some of the suggested books I will empower myself to move forward. Every post I read in here brings tears to my eyes. I'm finally seeing a light in the tunnel I've been living in!