Thank you feelingalone43! I'm slowly getting there. I do buy a case of beer each week when I grocery shop. I've been doing that for as long as I can remember. He buys the rest of it. I wonder what he would do/say if I told him I wasn't going to buy his beer anymore? I really hate to make waves or listen to his babble but I know I can't live like I have been anymore. It's killing me...driving me to eat, depression, low self-esteem, etc. I know I don't deserve it yet I'm still here sigh. When he's drinking I think more about leaving him. When he's sober I think...well maybe I won't leave. It's hurting my girls too and I can't stand that. My youngest won't bring her boyfriend to the house anymore because of his drinking. One day my oldest is going to cloud up and rain all over him. She hates what he does and she isn't one to hold her tongue for very long. It's really sad because it seems now he wants them to talk to him, be close to him and they don't really want to. He never really bonded with them when they were younger. He worked retail then and had odd hours for one, but when he got off work he went to drink with friends so wasn't home until late. He did that and I can't change it. So I just plod on taking it one day at a time.