Dear skye10.... grieving the loss of someone is a processes and you will go through a gammet of emotions. As time goes the intensity of those feelings will lesson. Feel what your feeling and then let it go. Keep the focous on you and being the best you, you can be. Have you been to alanon? I strongly urge you to attend a few meetings. It worked wonders in my life. I learned about me and why I do what I do and why im doing what im dong and soooo much more. Never let anyone live in your head rent free. Its important to remember where you came from, however it may not be healthy and may interfere with your healing if your reliving it to excess. Take it one day at a time and trust your higher power to bring you through this. Be good to yourself, God bless and prayers going up for you.