Thank you... it is what it is... I lived in the madness and I could not detach with love while living with him and Most importantly it was not healthly for our children nor myself... I made a tuff choice then and spent 5 years questioning myself off and on did I do the right thing should I of stayed and worked my program? Until he confirmed it was the right thing I felt more confident even though I knew I did, for me I did what I needed to do for me and my kids. Now I find myself wanting what fantasy is in my head... him to be clean and our lifes to be on tne same page. I know giving him money was dumb but I do feel confident he will repay me. I gave him 20 dollars about a year ago while he was waiting to be paid for a job he did and he hunted me down to pay me back. However it did not feel right or good about it and I wont again. I did tell him this... I don't want to treat him unkind and my son wants to see his dad so badly so allowing him to see his son is something I feel is the right thing to do. I guess I need to work my program and pray for strength courage and wisdom. Please keep us in your prayers .... thank you again