I found out the hard way that communication with my XAH makes it so much worse. I would cling to the "empty promises" and he could manipulate me so easily into believing that he could not do this without me and I would return or let him come home...over and over again!!! He always played on that "guilt" or "pity" I felt and I finally had to learn to stop dragging myself through the dirt. Frankly, everything that comes out of his mouth is BS and that hurts but it's the truth.