I was 24, he was 34. It was just a few beers everyday and a few binges here and there. He wasn't around a lot, I thought he was working. I wish I had been more aware, but I was pretty independent and this was the perfect guy for me.
26 years later and 3 children and he's not around much. He doesn't live with us and he's supposedly in recovery from alcoholism that progressed to more than beer. Hidden vodka and blackouts and DUI and who knows what.
It doesn't matter if I'm not his mother. I don't want alcohol in my life so he treats me like I'm his mother. We don't have a relationship. I am a hostage until I recover enough from the emotional manipulation to say enough and move on.