dbh

I have a elderly neighbor who is an alcoholic. She also has dementia.

She lives by herself at the end of my cul-de-sac. She often asks for rides to the grocery store to "pick up some things". Which means she needs to buy beer and wine. Everyone in the neighborhood knows she has a drinking problem. Her children know she has a drinking problem. The people in the grocery store know she has a drinking problem.

I've been giving her rides to the store every once in awhile. If she doesn't get a ride, she will walk (it's about a mile). I've often seen her ask strangers for rides home. I'm scared for her. I don't like giving her rides, but I rationalize it by thinking that she's safer in my car than the car of a stranger.

Today, I was walking my dog and she sort of ambushed me. She was a couple blocks from her house and asked if I could do her a favor and drive her to the store. I agreed. We head back to my house to drop off my dog. Then she had to go back home because she just realized she used her last check. I drove her back to her house. Guess what ... she couldn't find her checks!?! So, she needed another favor. Could I just lend her $20 until she gets to the bank tomorrow. I like a fool gave it to her.

So, I not only gave an alcoholic a ride to the store to buy alcohol but I BOUGHT the alcohol!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Next time I'm going to say no. It's not up to me to protect her from her addiction. Maybe what I did today prevented her from hitting her bottom.

I'm so mad at myself.

Thanks for listening.

db