Old 03-15-2012, 04:37 PM
  # 3 (permalink)  
Impurrfect
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Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Atlanta
Posts: 31,179
I can only tell you my experience. My DOC (drug of choice) was crack, and when I chose recovery, I was TOTALLY not ready to give it up "forever". I decided I would give myself 6 months, working "recovery" as hard as I worked at getting high. I clung to SR as a lifeline, as I didn't really realize what recovery was.

I prayed, a gazillion times a day, "please make be willing to be willing to give up crack". At some point, one of the "willings" dropped off. It was far before my 6 month deadline that I realized I was done with crack.

FWIW, I had promised myself that if I was still miserable or craving, like crazy, at 6 months? I could use. I simply could not accept "I will never use again" at first. Giving myself permission to use again, once I had given recovery my best shot, was what worked for me.

I just celebrated 5 years in recovery, a huge part of my recovery has been here at SR. My deal with myself may not work for everyone, but it certainly has worked for me.

Hugs and prayers,

Amy
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