Originally Posted by
Virgo59 
Sometime around Feb. 22 I posted about my mom passing away and discovering that AS had stolen her and my dad's wedding rings and a gold bracelet of hers. AS is in jail now because of several thefts - all to purchase drugs. I've been no-contact since he was arrested until yesterday. We spoke briefly and I have to admit that I'm still so angry with him, I could barely talk to him. I've got a pretty good idea that all that anger doesn't signal that my own codie recovery is going very well. Have any of you experienced that and did you get past it?
Well, anger in and of itself isn't a
bad thing. The reasons why you're angry are legitimate. Anger only becomes an issue when we allow ourselves to act out and behave poorly. I can tell you that I'm very guilty of allowing my anger to get the better of me from time to time.
When I feel my anger is starting to affect my judgement, I remember something that was said by a friend of mine in an Al Anon meeting:
You can't fight anger with anger. You can't fight hate with hate. You can only fight those with love.
And when I remember that, I ramp myself down. I will allow myself to
feel anger, but I work on not
feeding the anger.
So, feel what you feel. It's OK. Just work on not feeding the anger. Some days will be easier than others. Please be kind to yourself while you're healing from this.
All The Best,
ZoSo