As everyone says at least your seeking help and not just blowing it off even though you don't like AA. Of course AA isn't for everyone. But for myself it was a huge help. I've been sober 7 months now myself and I was a real wreck back 7 months ago. But I got back up, brushed myself off and continued to walk down the path of life even though there some major changes to my life due to drinking I still had my self worth seeing I was able to crawl back out of the dark hole I dug myself with drinking. My triggers when I lived on my own was just that. On my own so no rules about not drinking were gone so I did what I pleased and figured I can quit any time. Wrong. My landlord and another room mate were drinkers daily and everytime Id get ready for the night shift there she was plastered and having a party when I left. There were empty bottles everywhere and she always went to the liquor store so these triggers for cravings were too much, I couldn't function and even though I knew I was in the wrong place by 4 months living there I stayed because I just didn't want to quit and go back home. So it took me 5 months of drinking to realize I have to stop and move out, that and also the fact that I drank my money away so there was no way of paying my rent yet alone get any groceries so I could eat! I hope you find some good help and continue to strive to get sober. Some people recover faster then others and me being one of the many who drink over and over and over. Though my addictions counsellor did tell me I should be proud of myself because of the fact that I do indeed have more sober time then drunk time under my belt but even though thats a fact I still need to keep my guard up and not pick up that first drink because , like you, one drink and then I can't stop. I did a test when I first picked up again. I had one drink... but then that craving for more came in soo intense that I went out the next day and bought a heapp load of booze and intended to drink it all down which I made half way till I passed out on my bed with my friend passed out on the wood floor
yeesh I'm so glad I dont deal with that today! Good luck!