Nirvana...I commend you for what you are seeking, and I hope you find it. I am a protestant pastor's son, and often saw irony in the judgment of church people. Although I am a regular attending church member now, I have a disdain for the body politic of the church. I just don't believe it is what Christ's ministry was about, and He is our earthly example, in my opinion. That said, I rebelled from the church for about a decade. Only when I returned to practicing faith did I understand what it is all about.
As someone else said, each of us has to find what that is for us. It may or may not include church attendance or membership. I don't believe that is required by God. It's our beliefs, our willingness, and our hearts that will save us, not church membership.
I have always had a strong spiritual sensitivity. I get an incredible sensation when I can perceive the Holy Spirit in my life. That said, I have had that sensation in the rooms of AA at least as much as I've had them in a church setting, or any other life setting.
Put God in your heart, and ask Him how to respond. And, then...listen. He will answer.
Peace,