I hear ya!
I too kept getting frustrated with my partner when it came to helping with the kids, finances, discipline, etc.
I learned, with time, that I could not rely on my partner. I had to have a plan B that did not involve asking an alcoholic to be reliable.
As mad as I would initially get at my A, it usually shifted to anger at myself for having a premeditated expectation - again!
I kept expecting reasonable, sane actions from an unreasonable, insane adult.
I was still going to the hardware store looking for fresh bread.
It was a real struggle to come up with other options for childcare, finances and creative discipline - but I felt stronger for having learned how to do things without relying on the A in my life. It was part of my recovery process. I was learning to take better care of myself and my children and trusting myself to make good decisions.
Today: go ahead and vent/scream/curse/punch a pillow or whatever it takes to get this anger out of your system. The sooner you are rid of the anger (without harming others) the sooner you will be able to focus on your today.
What can you do today to take care of YOU and Your little ones?