welcome!
It sounds like you're already starting down a dark path - trying to cover up his behaviour (and feeling ashamed of it), crying long hours, going out searching for him. Most of us have been there and know exactly what that's like, and it is miserable.
Try Al Anon. It will help you take your power back and see things a bit more clearly. Knowledge is power. You will learn that it is not your responsibility to save him, in every sense of the expression. It is a struggle that ultimately, belongs to him, regardless of anything and everything you try to do against it. Many of the things we 'naturally' try, because we love them, unfortunately backfires. Begging, pleading, making them choose, putting up with their behaviour, yelling, pouting, threatening, pouring out their booze. If any of it sounds like anything you've ever tried or thought to try, you're in the right place.
Mine used to get very wasted when we were at bars or clubs - it was humiliating to try and get him out when he was on the verge of pass out and barely capable of walking, and keep a good face in front of others. Ruined just about every night out for me.
Al Anon taught me that I had to take the focus off of him and his drinking and put it on me. As difficult as it was, it did help me feel better. First off I learned how to detach, from him when he was drinking. I chose to not go out with him because I no longer wanted the responsibility of picking him up off the floor. That was in my power. Then, I slept in a different bed if he was in it and had been drinking (unless he passed out somewhere else). If he crept into bed at 3am, I went to the spare room (cuz of course I was likely awake or he woke me lumbering around trying to find the bed). Those actions were also sending a strong message without me expecting him to do anything different - so much more powerful than trying to control him into stopping his behaviour.
Icing on the cake, what finally jolted me into motion, was when we stayed with friends one night, as they lived further out. We both had young babies, and I put my daughter down in our room in a portable crib. Us girls went to bed early and the boys stayed up until they were wasted. When he stumbled into the room and tried to get his pants off and get into bed, he lost his balance and grabbed onto the closest thing - the baby crib - to try and steady himself. This was it for me and a few days after, I asked him to leave. He went for help and we eventually came back together, but at that point I was finally willing to let him go, for my own sanity and for the safety of my daughter.
You are still young, are not married, no children. You have found us here and you are learning already. You have the power to make the choices in your life and take care of yourself, and it can happen regardless of how hopeless you may feel at this moment. Take care of yourself.