a girls night out? that sounds like fun!
when i was with xABF, i came to accept his double standard. as in, he goes out all the time and sit at home with no money, trying to keep the roof from falling down. i forgot how to have fun, because so much of my energy was tied up in putting out the next fire or feeling so low from all of the anxiety of trying to live in crazyland.
what i have discovered is that part of my recovery is remembering that i am a free person. i'm allowed to go out and have fun. i'm allowed to do nice things for myself.
my vote is you go for the night out, one way or the other. you could hire a babysitter or perhaps the boys could stay with your parents? perhaps you have a friend who could take them for the evening? or perhaps they could go have a sleepover at their friends?
when i first came here, everyone would suggest i do something nice for myself. it was surprisingly hard to do, but once i forced myself, i must admit, i felt better. freer.
naive