im gonna try to start going. i really need some help. my mom says i make it worse for me each time i snoop cause i find out more. even though i know what i am gonna find.. its fun in away for some sick reason but it fustrating at the same time. i mean i didnt like him when he was clean number one he told me he was unattracted to me sexually. kinda dont like him when hes doped up either lol. i think im mainly staying with him because im so tired of going through the court system with my two older kids and really dont wanna do it with my daughter that i have with him. i mean theres no way in proving he is the way he is to the courts. and theres plenty of crap out there to fake a clean **** test. and he knows that cause he use to do it. so either i dont know what to do.. cause im so scared my daughter will be around it even though she is around it now but i am here to hide it kinda thing. my thoughts are racing and have so much to say but thats little of the situation