I am just wondering about the passive-aggressive behavior of your wife. Could it be that she is seeing you get healthy and wondering about her role? It may not be at all about you, but about how she perceives her place as you get well and are advocating for yourself. I think the sitting down and having a "meeting" with her and you alone is a great idea. Sometimes, it's hard to see the side of our loved ones in all this. We get healthy, they have to change their roles. It's not always about them "supporting" us, but learning who we are underneath, and who they are in relation to us. I'm sorry if this sounds mottled, but I've been on both ends, and know how hard ALL the readjustments are. Just because we're getting better doesn't mean it's more important than our loved ones needs or routines. It's not about support, it's about respect and compromise.
Lisa.