Greeneyes, I'm sorry to hear that you are having a rough time. But believe me when I tell you that it's pretty common. Even the success stories that you read about also have their share of falls before they triumped.
Friends (and family) are well-meaning and well intentioned. They see the alcoholic as the way they are. They see the faults of the person because they see how hurt you are. What I've come to realize is that no one really seems to get it unless they have been personally involved with someone that is an addict. I think that is why alanon can be such a wonderful support system. These people have been there - they truly understand.
Hang in there greeneyes!!! I'm standing behind you rooting you on and I know you can do this!