Hello
I started lurking in this forum earlier last week when not drinking during the week was a lot harder then I expected. It is/ was normal for me to drink at least a bottle of wine at home most nights of the week. As my user name indicates, I'm pretty athletic, and have been stalling in those efforts lately. I did some research and found out that when my body is dealing with the effects of alcohol it can't also build muscle and do good central nervous system stuff. Go figure.
So I though, no big deal I just won't drink during the week. Well I was crawling up the walls with boredom and couldn't wait for the weekend to get here so i could drink. Actually, I did cheat on that plan and had a bottle of wine Thursday night but told myself it hardly counted.
Yesterday I bought two big bottle of wine and had a couple of glasses before going to a party with all of my boyfriend's friends, and took a bottle. I drank the whole bottle there, acted like an idiot, said every random, stupid thing that popped into my head. That's just the part I remember.
This morning my boyfriend refuses to speak to me, I had dirt under my fingernails and something in my hair- indicating that I fell down, and feel like a shaky, crying mess. Clearly, i have a problem.
Now, I've embarrassed him, made an ass of myself and still have most of a bottle of my favorite wine in the fridge. I've had a shower and a protein shake and don't know what to do now.