Hey serenity,
Yes it's scary to see how people treat their health so poorly. But worrying and trying to control someone else's health does absolutely no good. It's their health. I have done research on medical conditions, nagged about how he should see a doctor. I had to turn it over. I was wasting energy that I could be putting into my recovery.
The first part of "Live and Let Live" is "live." That is where my attention should be. The second part is "let live." Letting go of trying to control others is the number one focus of us anons. It is what got us to the emotional devestation that made us reach out in the first place. When we let go of others, and focus on ourself, we begin to heal.
I know that Mr. Magic has treated his body very badly for many years. He avoids going to the doctor A) because he is afraid of what is wrong, and B) because he doesn't believe that it will do any good. I can't convince him otherwise. It doesn't hurt to talk to someone about what you see them doing. I just have to be sure not to get caught up in trying to control, manipulate, or take on responsibilities that aren't mine.
I am scared that the results of Mr Magics actions will cause him to be incapacitated, or ultimately die. I had to realize that I don't have control of when or if people die. All I have is today. I try to find the good, and appreciate it. I don't want to waste the time I do have with worry and fear if I can help it. Hugs, Magic