I'd like to talk to him and work out some sort of compromise...I'm afraid I'm going to get the same "you're trying to control me, and I need my space yada yada,"
I'm seeing red flags here, of the same kind DeVon is talking about.
If he says "I want to spend more time with these people and go to the bar" and you're wanting to work out a "compromise" -- you
are trying to control him. You're not listening to his words OR actions. You want him to do what you want him to do, so that you can feel better.
But you need to feel better on your own. It's not his job to adjust his life so that you feel better. And he's telling you by his actions that you are not the priority you want to be in his life. Listen to him.