live,
yes ive been meaning to go there and get some of their help. your right, getting there isnt the problem, its wanting it. sometimes i feel when i tell them what i need they look at me and say "well, she got adopted to a good family so now she doesnt have any problems or need our help." i feel that way because in school, the kids would say, "well you shouldnt have any problems because you got adopted. you should thank your lucky stars." and in general im probably in denial. i guess i have just dealt with things as they come because i wanted to avoid hearing people say how i should be thankful. then i started to believe what they say. they meaning the people who said that stuff as i was growing up.
my psychologist now is cool. but, will i open up and come out of my lonely hole? i dont know and dont care. i havent given up all hope so thats good. but i dont feel like i am taken seriously even though i probably am. and when i am taken seriously i want to go back to my lonely hole. i guess i should focus more on getting help from them for me than why they charge so darn much and why they forget my name. haha, yeah im sure the dude forgets a lot of names. dude is a cool word. i like it.
you rock!
hugs,
dot